Happy Father's Day, Dad!

Dear Dad,

Happy Father's Day!

Thank you for being such a great dad as you approach 89 years young. Your wisdom and guidance have shaped me in so many ways. You took the lessons from your own father (Sol, and his father Morris Dorf, and his father Boruch Bengelsdorf, and his father Medel, and his father Leyba Medlowicz Bengelsdorf, etc, etc). and somehow made them even better, enriching our lives with Jewish values, a deep sense of family, and a commitment to travel and adventure. Like Voltaire’s Candide, you always returned to your vegetable garden, slowing down the intensity of life with the Zen-like balance of a farmer, spending time in the greenhouse, and getting the plants into the Wisconsin soil just at the right time to have a bountiful harvest in the fall. The garden was so prolific before you downsized that you had to give most of the veggies to food shelters and friends. Always giving, helping others—true philanthropy.

My biggest challenge and inspiration is to be as good an example to my own children—how to teach them without being overly pedantic, to lead by example—not telling, but showing like you have done.  How to express the nuance of being a good person with your humility, your kindness, and your humor.  These are passed on to the next generation in subtle ways, not in the textbook of how to be a good dad.  It’s taught by observation and I’m seeing it now I fear, almost too late.  My kids are grown up, did I miss my chance by being too busy with my own life, consumed in my work—although I think you felt the same with your life.  As I work in my garden this morning pulling up some weeds, crumbling clumps of soil, I’m thinking of you.

You've been a religious Milwaukee Brewer season ticket holder since the Braves, and through all those games, you've taught me the importance of passion and dedication. Keeping score by hand, you reminded us of all the little details that go into a simple game. Your approach to business, always fair and ethical, has been an invaluable lesson even if us children took our own paths. But it’s you and Mom’s unwavering commitment to family that truly stands out. Always wanting “shalom b’bayit” (peace in the house), making sure that no matter what kind of differences you might have with any family member, you still demonstrate unqualified love. And you have done that with our kids and the even more divergent and challenging paths they are taking, showing respect and kindness as they push the boundaries of their lives.

I am so grateful for everything you've taught me and for the incredible example you've set. I look forward to seeing you soon and going to the Brewers game on your birthday.  Happy Father’s Day. 

With all my love,

Michael

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